在雅思写作世界里,永远不缺高分范文,有老外写的范文,有咱名师自己写的。每场考试过后,尘埃不落定,但范文已经若干篇了。今天小编给大家带来了怎样最大化利用一篇雅思写作范文,希望能够帮助到大家,一起来学习吧。
怎么来学习一篇9分范文?如何最大化地利用它?来自native speaker + IELTS examiner Simon的范文一篇,先阅读,再评鉴.
雅思题目:
More and more people are migrating to cities in search of a better life, but city life can be extremely difficult. Explain some of the difficulties of living in a city. How can governments make urban life better for everyone?
Cities are often seen as places of opportunity, but there are also some major drawbacks of living in a large metropolis. In my opinion, governments could do much more to improve city life for the average inhabitant.
The main problem for anyone who hopes to migrate to a large city is that the cost of living is likely to be much higher than it is in a small town or village. Inhabitants of cities have to pay higher prices for housing, transport, and even food. Another issue is that urban areas tend to suffer from social problems such as high crime and poverty rates in comparison with rural areas. Furthermore, the air quality in cities is often poor, due to pollution from traffic, and the streets and public transport systems are usually overcrowded. As a result, city life can be unhealthy and stressful.
However, there are various steps that governments could take to tackle these problems. Firstly, they could invest money in the building of affordable or social housing to reduce the cost of living. Secondly, politicians have the power to ban vehicles from city centres and promote the use of cleaner public transport, which would help to reduce both air pollution and traffic congestion. In London, for example, the introduction of a congestion charge for drivers has helped to curb the traffic problem. A third option would be to develop provincial towns and rural areas, by moving industry and jobs to those regions, in order to reduce the pressure on major cities.
In conclusion, governments could certainly implement a range of measures to enhance the quality of life for all city residents.(273 words, band 9)
雅思9分范文评析:
本题是一道多问题类型话题,①需要考生解析居住城市所遇见的困难,②以及给出政府所能做出的改善建议。
Cities are often seen as places of opportunity(a better life), but there are also some major drawbacks(extremely difficult/difficulties) of living in a large metropolis(a city). In my opinion, governments could do much more to improve city life(make urban life better) for the average inhabitant(everyone).
The main problem for anyone (who hopes to migrate to a large city) is that the cost of living is likely to be much higher than it is in a small town or village. Inhabitants of cities have to pay higher prices for housing, transport, and even food. Another issue is that urban areas tend to suffer from social problems such as high crime and poverty rates in comparison with rural areas. Furthermore, the air quality in cities is often poor, due to pollution from traffic, and the streets and public transport systems are usually overcrowded. As a result, city life can be unhealthy and stressful.
第二段,共五句:
①+②:生活成本高+细节拓展(举例:住房、交通、食物)——使用比较:be much higher, pay higher prices
③:社会问题多(举例:犯罪、贫穷)——使用比较:in comparison
句式:定语从句+表语从句
However, there are various steps (that governments could take) to tackle these problems. Firstly, they could invest money in the building of affordable or social housing to reduce the cost of living. Secondly, politicians have the power to ban vehicles from city centres and promote the use of cleaner public transport, which would help to reduce both air pollution and traffic congestion. In London, for example, the introduction of a congestion charge for drivers has helped to curb the traffic problem. A third option would be to develop provincial towns and rural areas, by moving industry and jobs to those regions, in order to reduce the pressure on major cities.
第三段,共五句:
①:简单总起
③+④:方案二,减少空气污染、减轻交通压力——限制汽车使用,使用清洁型新汽车。举例——伦敦拥堵费
In conclusion, governments could certainly implement a range of measures to enhance the quality(make urban life better) of life for all city residents(everyone).
结尾一句,再次申明观点,改写原文,或者改写首段第二句观点皆可。
全文总结:
全文共运用:被动句+表语从句+非限制定语从句+2句there be句+2句定语从句
large cities —— a large metropolis —— urban areas —— major cities
a better life —— places of opportunity
difficulties —— major drawbacks
do much more —— tackle these problems —— implement a range of measures
improve city life —— enhance the quality of life
everyone —— average inhabitant —— all city residents
rural areas —— a small town or village —— provincial towns —— regions
public transport —— vehicle —— traffic
public transport systems are usually overcrowded —— congestion
最后是来自Simon考官的友情提示:不要在连接词上费太多心思,用first of all替代first绝非文章的亮点所在!
所以,从词汇句子角度,可读;从行文框架思路角度,可读;从论证方法角度,可读,一鱼三吃,说的即是如此雅思好文。
Some people think that universities should not provide so much theoretical knowledge but give more practical training throughout their courses.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Model Answer:
In the past, a majority of academics have held the opinion that universities should only offer a theoretically-based approach to teaching throughout their courses, as opposed to the more recent trend towards empirical acquisition of knowledge involving more “hands on” experience. Is this the most effective way for students to learn vital academic information while undertaking their degrees? Undoubtedly, advantages and disadvantages of both academic learning styles have to be evaluated.
Firstly, on the one hand, despite being the more traditional educational approach, learning from theory in relevant academic discourses to identify established knowledge allows us to gain a professional insight. For example, students can easily identify facts and opinions from past discourses. In addition, students acquire knowledge more easily when given relative theoretical examples to build upon. For instance, in subjects such as history or sociology, studying textbook examples allows students to unravel complex academic theories which they could expand on. Alternatively, there are some disadvantages for students.
On the other hand, there is no doubt that students could find themselves reading tedious and monotonous academic papers. For instance, university degrees involving the evaluation of numerous ‘long-winded’ academic discourses provide little inspiration for students, discouraging enthusiasm. Obviously, interest can be stimulated through empirical research in class. By this I mean that ‘the human brain learns best by doing’. Although time-consuming, there is no substitute for learning from making mistakes.
In conclusion, while both approaches have benefits and drawbacks in our ever-changing academic world, I honestly believe that a more practical approach promotes a stronger acquisition of academic knowledge. In spite of the comprehensive nature which theoretical teaching can possibly provide, practical learning equals more positive learning for future generations.
It is widely believed that children of different levels of intelligence should be taught together, while others think that more intelligent children should be taught separately.
Discuss and present your own opinion.
Model Answer:
In past educational institutions, children have been taught together based on age regardless of intellectual ability displayed at school. Alternatively, a large proportion of the population believes there should be a strong move towards the separation of children of different intellectual capabilities in current educational institutions. From my own educational perspective, I honestly believe that younger students possessing higher intelligence levels than their peers ought to be separated into alternative levels based on their gift, for a number of reasons.
Admittedly, although young learners have the chance to learn a lot from associating with classmates their own age, it is widely believed that such a process isn’t considered to be vital for a healthy educational upbringing. The argument for intellectual separation holds some strong advantages. Firstly, by allocating students to classes based on levels of intelligence, high achievers have the opportunity to excel in a way that they couldn’t in a normal class. Owing to the fact that they can be placed into an unrestricted educational environment, students can excel with intellectual freedom.
Secondly, there is a strong argument in regards to inhibiting a child’s intellectual growth by restricting them from moving above their peers if their mental capability permits. Why should we limit the intelligence of our future generation? For instance, many of today’s highly successful artists and entrepreneurs in the world have come from an unrestricted educational background and have been allowed to explore their mind and careers to the fullest extent.
In conclusion, although I believe an educational environment for young learners should promote equal opportunity, I honestly think that creating a more liberal environment which enhances the learning capabilities of intellectually-gifted children will not only benefit individual’s careers but future society as a whole.
★ 英语写作
上一篇:雅思7分大作文范文批改和解析
下一篇:雅思写作易犯误区